Is simple easy?

Getting this straight can make a world of difference.

Sometimes an easy button sounds really nice.

Grass to mow, family to feed, reports to be completed, phone calls to make, groceries to buy? With the push of a button it’s all done and you’re kicked back sipping tea wondering, “Why is the sky blue?”

Easy.

Yet, more and more I’m learning that there’s more to life than “Easy” makes it sound.

Recently the flavor of the day for challenges at our household has been clean-up. As in, “Go clean-up your room.” No matter if you have kids or not, you were once a kid and I’m sure you recall the angst that surrounds that directive. Now, as a mom it would truly be so much easier to just scoop the toys up and toss them in their rightful places. In some ways, this is the more “logical” choice. Think about it, as an adult I can scoop more toys at a time, cover more ground and carry a larger load. So, doesn’t it make more sense to just put the toys away and avoid the whining, complaining, arguing and altogether unpleasantness of directing a chorus of 7 and unders to do the job? Well, yes and no.

Yes…it makes more sense if the objective is to get a tidy room in a timely manner.

No…it makes no sense if the objective is to raise functioning, responsible people who learn the value of taking care of the things entrusted to them.

I figure that since my choir of munchkins will be your neighbors and society’s influencers and leaders in a few short years, the easy button needs to stay on the shelf.

You may think I’m completely crazy (granted you’re probably not completely wrong) because I see life lessons in the mess of a kid’s room. You may think that it is unreasonable to expect 1, 3, 5 and 7 year-olds to tidy their own room (if you’re counting, yes they are tightly grouped and share a room – more on that later). You may think this does not apply to you because you’re not dealing with toy rooms right now.

Stick with me. This applies to you and to me.

Easy is the path of least resistance. This path is shrouded in half truths and lies disguised as promises. This path encourages you to “follow these 4 easy steps” or “drink this to clear away your trouble”. Yet, when you’ve completed the “easy steps” or finished the drink and still haven’t “arrived” you feel like you’ve failed. You have not failed. Instead, the process you were sold has fallen short on its promises. Easy promises fast fixes and sudden changes that require little to no work.

Simple is different.

Simple removes the clutter. It defines the goal. Simple celebrates the work and each part of the progress made.

In the case of the messy toy room:

Simple recognizes that toys are a learning environment. Simple is also why my four children share a room for now. One room provides a single classroom for life experiences – leadership, being on the receiving end of laziness, caring for others when they can’t care for themselves, etc. If my children can learn to care for their toys well (and learn the consequences of not caring for them well) they will have a foundation for valuing what they are entrusted with throughout their lives. If they learn to remove items that are not played with and only causes a mess without enjoyment, they establish a foundation for learning the value of saying “No” to even good things. This will in turn open their opportunities for more focused and quality driven “Yes” moments in their life.

So, what is your toy room issue?

If easy solutions (I use that word loosely as nothing is really getting resolved or solved) have left you feeling like a failure or as though you are beyond help, consider putting the easy button back on the shelf.

Quality. Improvement. Change. Progress. Achievement.

Those are words that gain value when effort is put into them. Easy steals the joy of your own effort and the celebration of your victories. Simple walks alongside you, helping you keep your focus and reminding you to graciously adjust when appropriate.

Simple reminds you that measurable does not mean a number must be involved. Instead, measurable is just as valid (maybe more so most often) when expressed in terms of level of joy, diminishment of stress, and freedom to live instead of just being alive.

You can do simple. Consider your goals. Choose one.

Start to clarify if this is an overall goal or a time driven goal. For example, “I want to be my healthiest me” is an overall goal. Yet, “I want to write a children’s book,” can be a time driven goal.

Overall goals can be simply broken down by focusing on one or two categories at a time.

Like, “I want my head space to be healthy,” or “I want to feel energized during my day.” Whereas time driven goals can have a date for completion set on them.

Once you have a specific statement, then you can set a smaller measurable goal that is a stepping stone toward your larger goal.

In the case of a healthier mind space, you could commit to purposefully speaking 1 positive comment about yourself to yourself daily. This could then grow into more productive steps as you nurse your thought life back to health.

In the case of writing a children’s book, you could start with committing to writing 1-2 pages a day. If that’s too much pressure, make it a line or two daily. The point is to create stepping stones of commitments that get you to your ultimate goal without feeling paralyzed by overwhelm.

Easy tells you that all of your problems can be solved in a few days or weeks.

Simple reminds you that problems can be overcome with time and purposeful persistence.

Easy is the flower grown in a pot, transplanted without concern of soil and doused in fertilizer. Without roots or proper care, it burns up and withers.

Simple is the seed gently germinated and then transitioned to a slightly windy spot to strengthen its structure before being transplanted to a soil specially prepared just for it. The flower will grow and likely flourish even if there are rough weather days. The persistence and timing in the plan took longer than the easy route, but made all of the difference in the health of the flower.

In your life, are you choosing easy where you could be changing simply?

written by Kelli Keller, D.O.