What is livable to you?
It’s not always a one-size-fits-all world.
There’s so much noise around us.
Right now I can hear a dryer tumbling clothes, a stool scooting across a floor (ranks right up there with nails across a chalkboard), laughing from a little one, clicking of keyboard keys, and the ding of a phone. Plus, that doesn’t even touch the thoughts– aimless wanderings, valid wonderings and mental to-dos – circling my mind creating a steady stream of noise.
Each sound productive in its own way…
Laundry done. Things reached. Joy shared. Work accomplished. Needs communicated. Ideas explored. Beliefs evaluated. Priorities set.
Yet, in chorus these helpful, useful, productive, life-giving things can become noise. Stress-inducing noise.
Be still. Take a moment and just take a break. Give yourself 5 good, deep breaths – focusing only on “Breathe in. Breathe out.” Go ahead. I’ll join you and be here waiting when you’re done.
1… 2… 3… 4… 5…
The idea of “getting healthier” often falls into this noise zone. There are well meaning and evidence-based recommendations for nearly every aspect of getting healthier. If following those recommendations is not working, then there are even more blogs, programs, ideas and social media groups that will tell you how you’ve been lied to or tricked and that being healthy is as easy as ______.
All the while, here I am and here you are drowning in the noise. In making time for the exercise that’s required to meet the guidelines or complete the program, in addition to buying the food and making the meals that are “really good for you”, it get’s increasingly stressful to help with homework, do your own homework, keep the dog fed, choose an outfit, finish that project, talk to your loved one, talk to your boss, call back that friend, answer those emails, read that article, learn that lesson, take a shower, give a bath, help them, re-do that, and find a way to take time for yourself (because ‘they’ say that’s important too).
That’s a lot of noise. A lot of stress. A lot of not helpful at all.
So, how do we figure out what is livable? You see, livable is not the same as the idea of “you do you” or “you only live once” or even “truth is relative”. Finding a balance between knowing what is beneficial and how to incorporate the right amount of that into your life, right now is discovering what is livable.
There is a word that is not commonly discussed in medical arenas that I think enters into this conversation. Autonomy. In legal terms this is all about self-governing in terms of the law. However, in the health arena it takes on more of the same connotation as livable.
Take me as an example:
I know my chance of a heart attack or stroke later in life is less likely if I do some form of work-out that gets my heart pumping and lungs moving (the studies say for 150 minutes a week). Yet, try as I might, when working out (especially longer workouts) becomes higher on my priority list, other things are forced down the list (things like clean clothes or sleep or kids fed…don’t even get me started on kids fed veggies at every meal). Trying to meet the recommendations, causes me to break other recommendations (think sleep lost, tears shed, yelling resulted, negative self-talk, stress added).
You get the picture. You might even LIVE the picture with me.
This is where the idea of livableYOU comes in. Together we are walking this messy road and finding ways to see progress as wins when we fall somewhere short of the recommendations. You see, the truth is not relative (exercise improves health, vegetables are packed with necessary vitamins and minerals, protein is needed for growth, the body requires rest, and the list goes on…). However, there is still room for grace and forgiveness as we work to walkout those truths.
Is there a part of your health you are looking to improve? Have you tried before only to feel more stressed and less healthy?
Yeah, me too.
For me, I’m naturally good at prioritizing people and relationships. Rest – not so much. Incorporating more veggies than Oreos – it depends on the day. Hydrating well – I have my successful streaks and then the days I completely forget what water even tastes like. Stress relief – I’m working on that. Exercise – if chasing kids were an Olympic sport, I’d be in the running for gold.
All of that to say – we are a work in progress. There are standards worth knowing and we are here to share the simple strategies we have found that make meeting those standards a little less stressful. Not everything will fit or work every time. Actually, you will likely find that different phases of life require a readjusting of priorities and grace in areas that were previously on-point.
That’s ok.
Celebrate the wins – no matter how small they may seem. Forgive the short comings – in yourself and in others. Recognize that none of us have it all figured out. Keep learning and exploring what helps you strike a balance so that you are striving for healthy while joyfully living.
written by Kelli Keller, D.O.
This week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week.
So, if you (like me) have struggled with disordered eating or a diagnosed eating disorder, please know that we here at livableYOU want to help. Diet culture works to convince you that food and all the details that surround it determine your worth. They do not. It does not. Your worth is based upon who made you, not what you’re made of. If you or someone you love need help, please reach out to us or check out NEDA.
